Dave-ologies: Being different makes the difference

This weekend, as I was winding down Sunday night and thinking about my Monday work day – I was talking with my wife about various things. The 2017 iHeartRadio Music Awards were on in the background and we would occasionally pause to watch a bit of the show. Justin Timberlake had just won an award for his “Can’t Stop the Feeling!” song. A catchy tune we all have in our heads. What caught my attention was his inspiring message about anti-bullying and the importance of inclusion. I am not usually a big fan of celebrity messages, because they are often staged and planned, but this message was heartfelt and (to this listener) seemed authentic.

High school is tough enough – we all lived through the ups and downs of adolescence. That said, I would argue the rise in bullying and the rise in racial tensions today is making it even harder on our kids. Suicide is the third leading cause of death among young people between the ages of 10-19. Although the percentage of U.S. high school students who considered suicide fell by nearly half between 1991 to 2009 (from 29 percent to 14 percent), this percentage has increased slightly in recent years. In 2011, roughly one in every six high school student considered suicide. The data also points to important differences by gender, race, and ethnicity. Among high school students, for example, girls are more likely to have planned or attempted suicide than boys, while Hispanic and black students are more likely to have attempted suicide than white students. However, the suicide rate is over three times higher for boys than girls, and is higher for white than for black or Hispanic youth. Further, suicide rates are highest among Native American/Alaska Native youth compared with other racial/ethnic groups (Child Trends – 2016). More attention should also be paid to how a changing technology and media landscape affect a teens’ experience with bullying and mental health. Teen suicide was again in the national news last month with the story of a Florida girl who ended her life apparently in response to persistent cyber-bullying. Her death is just the latest in a series of high profile cases in which a young person committed suicide after being victimized by cyber-bullying.

I was glad to see Timberlake speak out and very pointedly speak to being inclusive. We owe it to our next generation, whether they are your kids or others, to build a more accepting culture. At home, at work, with your buds in the bar. It is sad to watch the way these negative behaviors are affecting our youth. And as he stated, “no young people should be shunned or bullied because they are different.” He went on to say, “I wrote this song because I wanted it to be about inclusion, about being together. And so, I guess I want to take this opportunity to speak to young people right now ‘cause there’s a lot of you looking at me … If you are black or you are brown or you are gay or you are lesbian or you are trans — or maybe you’re just a sissy singing boy from Tennessee,” Timberlake continued, to growing applause. “Anyone that is treating you unkindly, it’s only because they are afraid or they have been taught to be afraid of how important you are. Because being different means you make the difference. So f— ’em.”

Being different makes the difference. As Desmond Tutu once said, “We inhabit a universe that is characterized by diversity. There is not just one planet or one star; there are galaxies of all different sorts, a plethora of animal species, different kinds of plants, and different races and ethnic groups. God shows us, even with a human body, that it is made up of different organs performing different functions and that it is precisely that diversity that makes it an organism. If it were only one organ, it would not be a human body. We are constantly being made aware of the glorious diversity that is written into the structure of the universe we inhabit, and we are helped to see that if it were otherwise, things would go awry. How could you have a soccer team if all were goalkeepers? How would it be an orchestra if all were French horns?”

Make a difference, stand up and act against the behaviors that are not kind. Together. We. Win.

If someone shows the warning signs of suicide: Do not leave the person alone, remove any firearms, alcohol, drugs or sharp objects that could be used in a suicide attempt, call the U.S. National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), and take the person to an emergency room or seek help from a medical or mental health professional.

Dave Harmon

People Division

“Kindness is Currency”

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/davidharmonhr