Humble and Kind…

Sometimes life sends messages in funny ways.  I am probably as frustrated as you watching what is happening daily around us in politics, in the government, in the workplace, in social media and even in our schools.  I shake my head in disbelief at the divisiveness around every door we open.  Where has respect and kindness gone? 

I am not a country music listener.  I like it, but do not love it.  For whatever reason this weekend, I was listening to country and came across Tim McGraw singing his song “Humble and Kind” and it resonated with me.  And it was also on the radio as I was reading an article titled, “How Men Get Penalized for Straying from Masculine Norms” (Mayer). The article was eye-opening in that the research demonstrated that men too face backlash when they don’t adhere to masculine gender stereotypes — when they show vulnerability, act nicer, display empathy, exhibit modesty, etc.. This is troubling because it discourages men from behaving in ways known to benefit their teams and their own careers.  More agreeable men across multiple industries made an average of 18% less in income and were evaluated as less likely to have management potential as compared to less agreeable men. I DO NOT AGREE! 

So, I thought I would offer some tips for those of us who value kindness.  You can be kind and humble while being successful.  The key is to make sure people understand you are nice AND assertive.  You can have high standards, hold people accountable, setting aggressive goals, ask the tough questions … while being kind. So with this said, I thought I would leave you with some tips that I have learned over the years:

• Take the credit humbly AND give the credit for a job well done
• Listen more
• Continue to ask compelling questions
• Continue to share your knowledge
• Pay attention to details
• Treat everyone fairly
• Continue to ask for feedback (welcome criticism)
• Appreciate success of others
• Admit your mistakes
• Do not micro manage
• Let other people brag. 

You can be kind and humble and successful doing all of these in a nice way.  Maybe Mr. McGraw should be a life coach {lyrics below}…

You know there's a lot that goes by the front door
Don't forget the keys, under the mat
Childhood stars shine, always stay humble and kind

Go to church 'cause your momma says to
Visit grandpa every chance that you can
It won't be a waste of time
Always stay humble and kind

Hold the door, say please, say thank you
Don't steal, don't cheat, and don't lie
I know you got mountains to climb but
Always stay humble and kind

When the dreams you're dreamin' come to you
When the work you put in is realized
Let yourself feel the pride, but
Always stay humble and kind

Don't expect a free ride from no one
Don't hold a grudge, or a chip and here's why
Bitterness keeps you from flying
Always stay humble and kind

Know the difference between sleeping with someone
And sleeping with someone you love
“I love you,  ain't no pick up line so
Always stay humble and kind

Hold the door say please say thank you
Don't steal, don't cheat, and don't lie
I know you got mountains to climb but
Always stay humble and kind

When those dreams you're dreamin' come to you
When the work you put in is realized
Let yourself feel the pride but
Always stay humble and kind

When it's hot, eat a root beer, a popsicle
Shut off the AC and roll the windows down
Let that summer sun shine
Always stay humble and kind

Don't take for granted the love this life gives you
When you get where you're goin'
Don't forget turn back around
Help the next one in line
Always stay humble and kind

·       Tim McGraw

Together.  We.  Win.

Dave Harmon
People Division
“Kindness is Currency”
LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/davidharmonhr

Look for us on: LinkedIn, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, The Muse, Glassdoor and USA TODAY NETWORK Careers

Managing is not for Dummies….

So many of you heard this week about Chicago Cubs manager Joe Maddon.   The Chicago Cubs manager said Tuesday at the winter meetings that he’s reading the book “Managing Millennials for Dummies” to help him be a better manager.

“It’s a great read, ‘Managing Millennials for Dummies.’ I’m in the middle of that right now,” Maddon said. “And you always think this for dummy’s thing is really rudimentary written, it’s really well written and researched. I’m learning about traditionalists, Baby Boomers, the X’ers, the Millennials. And I’m really starting to understand this a little bit better.”

He then said, “I think it’s important for me as a manager obviously, whether anybody here agrees or disagrees with the generation and how they process things, it doesn’t matter, because that’s the way it is. And if that’s the way it is, just like my dad, that generation, thought we were a bunch of babies, the Boomers, the traditionalist thought, they’re all soft. It doesn’t matter. You have to figure out how to communicate and extract the best out of this group and make sure that you’re always on the same page.”

“You have to make your adjustments, and that’s what I’m working on right now, is to understand better how I could better serve these guys,” Maddon said.

Many of the news outlets have picked up on Coach Maddon’s age (mid 60’s) and the Millennial generation.  What I picked up was a people-focused manager trying to better understand his team.  Better understand how they think, how to communicate, how to connect?  Who would not want to work for a leader who is continuously trying to better understand what makes the team “go”?

Think about when you travel abroad.  Many countries have differing cultures than we do. Knowing this, many of us might spend significant time learning how to better communicate with the residents.  We might look up the meanings of common terms, understand local issues,  and access key attractions.  We would do research to make the experience better.  Why not do this as a leader?

Similarly, when you first become a leader or inherit a new team, it’s helpful to spend time up front connecting and creating a common language with our teams. When your team knows how you like to work and how you plan to manage them, they’re able to produce results faster. When you know how each of your direct reports likes to work and communicate, you’re able to save time when setting direction and following-up.  It improves the team dynamics.  It is a “two-way” street of learning.

Some questions to ask as you learn more about your team:

            Who are “morning” people and who are “afternoon” people?

            Who needs their coffee first?

            Who likes data verses who is an emotional decision maker?

            Who makes quick decisions and who processes?

            Who is introverted, who is extroverted?

            Who is direct and frank vs. who is sensitive and needs time?

            Who is a “fixer” and who is a “identifier”?

            Who are optimists and who are pessimists?

            Who is serious and who likes humor?

            What are their respective communications styles?

            What are they passionate about?

            What are their “hot buttons”?

            What are their quirks?

You get the idea.  There are probably a hundred more questions you can ask – the point is to ask or observe.  Can you answer most of those questions about your team?  Each and every one of these are important to the success of the team.  Even the pessimist – they are good at playing devil’s advocate.  They are good at finding the problems or potential downfalls with your ideas.  Having a diverse mix is important, but understanding who has what characteristics and how to manage to those is more important.

Maybe you think about running your team through the DISC assessment tool.  Half my team just completed this exercise and they still are talking about it a few weeks later.  The DISC breaks down personality into four categories. They are:

Decisiveness - For these steamrollers, getting the job done is the most important thing. Never mind minor details or possible hurt feelings. As long as the end goal is achieved, they're good. They're our problem solvers and will keep the company moving along.

Interactive - The people's people, they are outgoing and the life of the party. They're also expressive, impulsive and persuasive and can lose focus easily.   They're creative and fun to be around.

Stabilizing - The ultimate team player, they're unbelievably loyal, steady and concerned about how everyone feels. They'll run from conflict and can sometimes be slow to make a decision.  They're patient, make great teachers or coaches and are devoted to the team and the company. 

Cautious - The perfect job for a C? Anything with more rules than you can shake a bureaucrat at. They love them, as well as details and procedures. They have some of the highest quality-control interests of any of the styles.

Remember, your teams can become unbalanced if all team members have similar styles of behavior or team roles. If your team members have similar weakness, the team as a whole may tend to have that weakness. If your team members have similar team-work strengths, they may tend to compete (rather than co-operate) for the team tasks and responsibilities that best suit their natural styles.

One last recommendation is to think about how you can better connect with your team (from a Forbes article I read by Martin Zwilling).   Building engaged team members is a key step in becoming an effective team leader, even if your team is spread all over the country:

Be genuine and transparent. If you are not, your team will see right through it.  Treat each person as THEY want to be treated.  Be genuinely interested in learning something new every day from your team, and they will follow you.

Make time for your team. We need to schedule regular and predictable times to only be working and interacting with your team.   Sometime in the morning and sometime in the afternoon may be enough, if you make it happen consistently.

Maintain regular “town halls” with the entire team.  This can even be done remotely via Skype, but it’s important that every team member attends. Actively listen as they summarize their accomplishments, and their plan for the weeks ahead. Leadership is making sure they have resources and understand the strategy.

Walk Around.  This is one of the most effective ways to find out what is going on, as well as an opportunity to provide feedback.  Hit the floor and stop at people’s desks. Ask them what is going on, both in the team and outside of work.  Really listen.

Recognize individual efforts. Pay attention to great work. Most leaders don’t say “thank you” enough. Recognition in front of peers is often more motivating than monetary awards.

Reduce your outside engagements. You won’t be viewed as the team leader if you spend most of your time on activities that are not relevant to your team. Be visible and engaged on a full-time basis. 

This is where your personal leadership becomes business leadership, which can actually change the world with your team.  Challenge yourself to make some changes and see if the team responds.  Also, ask for feedback along the way.

Together.  We.   Win.

Dave Harmon
People Division
“Kindness is Currency”
LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/davidharmonhr

Look for us on: LinkedIn, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, The Muse, Glassdoor and USA TODAY NETWORK Careers

The Santa Challenge

In the Spirit of St. Nicholas or Santa or Dave…

The true story of Santa Claus begins with Nicholas, who was born during the third century in a small village.   At the time, the area was Greek and is now part of the southern coast of Turkey. His wealthy parents died in an epidemic while Nicholas was still young. Nicholas used his whole inheritance to assist the needy, the sick, and the suffering. He dedicated his life to serving. Nicholas became known throughout the land for his generosity to those in need, love for children, and concern for sailors and ships.

Santa Claus is generally depicted as a portly, jolly, white-bearded man—sometimes with spectacles—wearing a red coat with white fur collar and cuffs, white fur-cuffed red trousers, a red hat with white fur and black leather belt, boots and carrying a bag full of gifts for children.

Dave Harmon is generally depicted as a “you hold your weight well kinda guy”, jolly, unbearded man (cannot actually grow one)—sometimes with a goatee—wearing jeans (every day) with a quarter zipper sweater, funky socks, a Dodger/Packer hat with a black leather belt and zipper boots and carrying a bag full of stories for LinkedIn.

So where am I going with this?  Well, it is not about me, but about the spirit of giving.  How can we all take that spirit and spread it through the holiday season?  Whether you are St. Nicholas, Santa, Dave, Sally or Raj.  Let's all take a little of that “spirit of helping others” to the next level. 

So here is my “Santa Challenge”:

Can you up your game in how you love one another and seek to make everyone happy?

Can you give of yourself by thought or word or deed in every gift that you give?

Can you share your joys with those who are sad?

Can you never close your hand against the needy?

Can you always outstretch your arm to aid the weak?

Can you provide quick and genuine sympathy in times of trouble?

Can you recognize a friend and brother (sister) in every person you meet upon life's common road?

And finally….

Can you live your life throughout the entire year in this holiday spirit?

Together.  We.  Win

Dave Harmon
People Division
“Kindness is Currency”
LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/davidharmonhr

Look for us on: LinkedIn, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, The Muse, Glassdoor and USA TODAY NETWORK Careers